Striving for Excellence in Taqwa & Character

Archive for the ‘Guest’ Category

Be A Friend (part 2)

By Ayesha K

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The second step on the road to befriending your teen: Communication

Let’s me introduce you to the residents of Upturn Street, its 8.35 on a Monday morning and the Ahmed household at number 32 are preparing for their day.  Mr Ahmed has already left for work and the children are finishing the last remnants of their breakfast and preparing  for the imminent arrival of their school bus. Well, all the children except Sumayyah who is still in the bathroom. The anxiety levels of her mother Sawdah are rising at Sumayyah’s tardiness. She knocks on the bathroom door.

“Sumayyah! What are you doing in there? You are going to miss your bus! Hurry up!’

“I’m not coming out ever!” comes Sumayyah’s response from inside the bathroom.

Sawdah’s anxiety levels go through the roof and she starts banging on the bathroom door.

“You’d better come out right now young lady! You are going to miss your bus! I’m going to be late for my doctor’s appointment if I have to drop you off!”

“You don’t understand me! I wish you would leave me alone” shouts Summayah as she storms past her mother. The sound of the school bus leaving is heard from outside. Sawdah sighs, now not only will she be late for her doctor’s appointment but she will have to share a car journey with a bad tempered teenager. What has happened between her and Sumayyah? They use to get along so well, now it’s constant fighting between the two of them.

Is this the stuff of your nightmares? Or is this the nightmare that has become your reality? Don’t worry all is not lost! There is plenty that you and Sawdah can do to avoid these situations reoccurring in the future. So let’s discuss the steps that we can take to effectively improve the communication between us and our teenagers.

Understanding

As we discussed previously the first step to befriending our teenage children was developing an understanding of them. Understanding them paves the way to the second step of developing effective communication with them. Understanding that their perspective on the world is completely different to yours is vital for effective communication. Your perspective on the world is built on your many years of experience, whilst they have yet to have the experiences they need to mature and fully think like a mature adult.

When we approach a conversation with our teenagers we need to empathise with them. So if we go back to the example of Sawdah we can see this is something she failed to do. She was too focused on her own issue of being late for her appointment to realise there may have been a reason for Summayah not wanting to come out of the bathroom. So take a moment and step into your teen’s world which is very different to yours and try and see their concerns from their perspective.

Controlling your emotions

Always keep your emotions out of your interactions. I know, I know it’s harder than it sounds, BUT it is possible. It goes back to tazkiyah and what every Muslim should be aspiring to achieve in all parts of their lives: controlling our nafs, training our souls so we reach the level of ihsaan in all aspects of our lives. So when your teenager does what in your eyes is outrageous behaviour take a deep breath and put your emotions to one side before you approach the situation. If during the interaction you feel yourself losing your temper or you sense your child is becoming emotional, then take ‘time out’ for both of you to calm down and then approach the subject again in a calm manner. Controlling your emotions will enable you to have effective communication between the both of you and will have the added benefit of aiding your spiritual development.

Collaborating a situation together

Remember your teen is making the transition from childhood to adulthood now. They are no longer the child whose actions you have full control over or who depends on you for their decisions. In this time of their life you have to hand over some of the control that you have over their world and let him or her choose how to solve his/ her struggles. This doesn’t mean we give over the reins completely but we collaborate with them to come to a solution together. So what is the best approach to help them achieve a solution on their own with a little guidance from you?

First of all it is always important to convey that you have confidence in your teen’s ability to work his issues out and that his problems are under his control now. So if we go back to the example of Sawdah instead of the confrontational ‘What are you doing in there?’ a more effective question would have been: ‘Are you ok? Is there anything I can do to help you catch your school bus?’ or with a child struggling with their studies: “Do you have any ideas how we can organise your time so you can keep up with your studies?”. Posing your questions this way provides the opportunity for you both to discuss solutions together and affirms your confidence in your teen. After discussing this with them encourage them to think critically about each possible solution; the consequences, problems with the solutions and the potential for success of the solution.

Recognise the extent of your responsibility

Recognising how your responsibility towards your teen has changed will help you approach your interactions in an effective way.  When they were a child it was your responsibility to make the correct decisions for them and to discipline them accordingly if they made an incorrect choice, this has now changed. The pen has dropped on your child’s account; THEY are also accountable for their actions. Your role in their nurturing has changed; you now have the responsibility of advising and giving them correct guidance. They are responsible for their actions and you are responsible for yours. So if an exchange between the both of you becomes heated, it is your responsibility to keep your actions in check and not respond in anger. Let them know you will only speak to them in a civil manner. Always ask yourself ‘How does Allah want me to behave in this situation? What do I need to do in this situation to gain Allah’s pleasure?’ Once we have acquired this sincerity we will no longer convey to our children that we are in desperate need for them to act in a certain way. Our interactions will no longer be a battle of trying to force them to change or improve. Allah is the changer of hearts. We do our best to advise and then leave it to Him. When our teenager no longer has us to fight he may concentrate on the opponent he needs to wrestle with; himself.

I’m going to take you back to Upturn street now and this time we are going to visit the Choudhurys at number 67. They woke up to exactly the same situation as the Ahmeds but this time it was their daughter Fatima who was held up in the bathroom with her mum Maryam slowly getting agitated outside. Maryam checks her watch anxiously, takes a deep breath and makes a silent dua before approaching the bathroom door. She knocks on the door gently and asks,

‘Fatima, is everything OK in there?’

Fatima grunts a ‘Yes’ in reply. Maryam checks her watch again and takes another deep breath to calm herself down.

‘Are you sure? Is there anything I can do to help you catch your bus on time?’ Maryam persists gently.

After a long silence, Maryam says

‘Well, I’ll be downstairs dear if you decide you want my help’ and starts to walk away but pauses when the bathroom door slowly creaks open to reveal a forlorn looking Fatima.

‘Mum, I can’t go to school with huge thing on my nose!’ Fatima cries, pointing to a smallish pimple on her nose.

‘Maybe you could think of ways to cover it?’ Maryam replies reassuringly. They start to discuss.

Five minutes later, a happier looking Fatima kisses her mother before boarding her bus with her pimple now hidden from view, courtesy of her mum’s make up skills and a dab of concealer.

Maryam has shown that when we use the tools of effective communication by empathising with our teen, giving them the control to choose to take our help, keeping our emotions under check and keeping  our issues out of the conversation we can help our teenager find solutions to his problems.  This will allow our teenager to acquire respect for us and we will be well on our way on the road to befriending our teenagers.

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Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – ‘Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

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Building your child’s Islamic Character

By Shamim F

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Moulding your child’s akhlaq, moral conducts

Our moral conducts (akhlaq) are like our garments, visible to all. Working on perfecting our akhlaq is part of our religion.

Principles of moral conduct:

Adab is that which is praiseworthy in actions and utterance and considered the best of ethics. Islam offers boundaries and measures by which adab can be taught, for instance in dealing with one’s parents, interacting with scholars, family and neighbours etc., how to dress, how to worship and general politeness.

Truthfulness – taught by way of example as children often learn from what they see.

Trustworthiness and honouring confidences – raise your children to be discreet and honourable, even a statement said in confidence is a trust that must be honoured.

Pure of Heart – train your children to pure in their hearts and discourage spite, envy or insincerity by nipping it in the bud. Teach them to forgive and move on.

 

Emotional and Psychological welfare

Principles of building emotional and psychological strength:

Affection/Play– always try to be affectionate and loving. Play with your children. The Prophet of Allah would show affection to children and demonstrate his love and concern for them by wiping their hair, particularly the orphan children.

Give gifts – as the Prophet of Allah said ‘Exchanging gifts lead to love’

(al- Tabarani)

Meet them smiling – let your children feel you value their company and enjoy them being around you.

Show your concern – by asking them how they are, showing interest and sympathy.

Be just and fair – always be fair in dealings with your children to avoid breeding jealousy amongst them.

Restrain yourself – do not fall into the trap of over-indulging your children as it will be destructive in the long term.

 

Developing healthy children

Play is a natural instinct that Allah bestows on all children. It is a means to develop their physical body and an education in life. Physically healthy bodies are better able to worship Allah with consistency and energy, and a healthy start in life will increase you child’s likelihood of succeeding.

Principles of building a healthy body:

Child’s right to learn sports – it is one of your child’s rights to be permitted physical exercise. Archery, horse-riding and swimming are recommended. In addition to being both physical and educational sports have many other benefits, including:

Social: learning how to interact with people in different situations

Moral: a lesson in right and wrong, dealing with success/failure

Innovative: they often encourage new ideas

Confidence boosting: opportunity to learn new skills.

Stress reliever: sports often provide a vent to release any stresses etc.

Friendly competition and play – competitions are good motivators and allow a sense of ‘community’ and ‘togetherness’ to develop between the competitors.

Play with your children – the Prophet of Allah would play with his grandsons and would allow them to play with him.

Note: never allow your children to play out of doors after sunset.

 

Intellectual and academic development

Acquiring knowledge is an obligation on all muslims. As per Hadith in Sahih al-Bukhari, our Prophet Muhammad (May peace be upon him) said: ‘Educate, make it easy ; not difficult,..’

Principles in developing the intellect:

Motivation – plant the love of knowledge an learning in your child early on. Inspire them with the Hadith extolling knowledge and those who seek it. Recognise their achievements with tangible rewards.

Memorise the Qur’an – create an achievable plan for Qur’an memorisation and work on their and your ikhlas.

Find righteous teachers  and tailor goals according to each child’s needs and capabilities. Work towards maximising their strengths and passions.

Arabic language – Arabic is the key to the Qur’an and Hadith and allows one to access a vast library of Islamic works.

Make knowledge accessible – invest in good books and a comprehensive Islamic library.

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Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – ‘Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

The Birds and the Bees

By K. A. Musa

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Children from an early age are curious about their body. It is not uncommon for a boy and girl toddlers to look at each other and wonder why their body parts differ and especially common when putty training or changing the diapers.

At what age is ‘sex’ education essential? This is dependent on the parents but the best method is to make the education age dependent. What a child of 2 years old will understand will be different to a child of 12 years old. What is not advisable is to ignore such questions raised by the child. We live in a time where a child of 8 years old knows a lot more than the parents might want to admit to themselves. Like adults children are exposed to the media where provocative images are visible, they have access to the internet and if unsupervised can be used inappropriately. Take control and education your child on this issue instead of relying on others.

You might (and can) take your child out of ‘sex & relationship’ lessons at school but you cannot remove or protect them from outside influences such as friends and media. Children need to be taught this within an Islamic framework of halal relationship within marriage. If a child asks a question in an inappropriate time, you are shocked and have no answer then do not ignore the question by pretending not to have heard. You can postpone answering at that time but make sure that the child is aware of this and an answer will be provided later.

Other challenges…

You know your child and if you have a ‘hot’ child that is ready for marriage then assist in finding him/her an appropriate spouse. Recently I attended a wedding where the bride was young (18 years old) but she is still studying. Marriage at such an age does not mean that ones life is over. When your son or daughter is ready then facilitate marriage as this will prevent zina (fornication).

Children should be taught to seek permission before entering their parents’ room to avoid unnecessary embarrassment(1).

Children should be trained to lower their gaze(2) but we should be ‘normal’ Muslim and not hypocritical when out and about performing our daily routines. We can not walk about with our eyes closed and the first look is permissible(3).

The messenger of Allah (peace & blessing of Allah be upon him) taught us to separate our children in beds when they reach the age of 7(3).

Talking about ‘sex’ education within an Islamic context need not be a cultural taboo. It is advisable for the parents to be the teachers instead of delegating to others. You need to be aware of the physical and mental changes that your child is going through. Stick to the facts, make it age appropriate and always have an open communication and encourage your children to talk to you when they have questions. You will not be with your children at all times but be their friends and especially when teenagers as if they are able to talk to you then you will be able to guard them against Fitnah (trials and tribulation) in sha Allah.

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References:

Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

1Qur’an: 24:58-59 (Surat An-Nur / Light)

2Qur’an: 24:31 (Surat An-Nur / Light)

3 The Messenger of Allah (peace & blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “O Ali, do not follow a glance with another, for you will be forgiven for the first, but not for the second.” (Tirmidhi 2701).

Additional resources:

Sex & Relationship Education in State School: Hotline: 07883 027 067.

Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – The Divine Protection. The Fiqh & Power of the Daily Supplications. Taught by Sheikh Hacene Chebbani.

Health is Wealth

By K. A. Musa

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Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessing of Allah be upon him) states: “Grab five things before five others: ….your health before your illness…”1.

Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessing of Allah be upon him) advised us to be more productive and make good use of our time whilst young and healthy before becoming old and in poor health. Our body and health are gifts from Allah (glorified & exalted) and as a result we need to look after them. Children are now becoming more obese due to poor diet and lack of exercises. After all you are what you eat!!! We consume foods high in fats, sugars, contain less fibre and heavily processed so it is not surprising that our waist bands are also increasing. For some, due to a poor work-life balance parents no longer have the time to cook a meal from scratch using raw and natural ingredients. Families are no longer eating together. A Sheikh once said “A family that eats together is a family that stays together.” Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessing of Allah be upon him) said “Eat together and do not disperse” (Abu Dawud, 3764).

A healthy and balance diet consisting of all of the food groups and eating in moderation is highly recommended. Our Shari’ah provides us with numerous guidance in regards to healthy eating as there is a link between one’s physical, mental and spiritual health. To avoid overeating we should implement the recommendation of 1/3 of your stomach food, 1/3 for water and 1/3 for air2.

Regular exercises are required for maintaining a healthy weight and it does not need to be expensive. Get some skipping ropes and just skip 100 times per day or take the children to the park. Walking is free and one can appreciate the beauty of the creations of Allah (glorified & exalted) and can be a fun activity for the entire family to participate in.

Cleanliness is half of Deen and as such we should keep our body clean and this is emphasised daily by performing ablution for salah. For oral hygiene we should occasionally practice the Sunnah and use the Miswak to clean our teeth. A healthy body and sleeping early will enable you to wake up your family for fajr salah. Do also wake up your children as the sooner this habit is established the easier it will be to maintain in sha Allah. Teach your children the morning and evening adhkar as well as adhkar for protection before sleeping3.

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References:

Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

1The Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said: ‘Grab five things before five others: your youth before your decrepitude, your health before your illness, your wealth before your poverty, your leisure before your work, and your life before your death” (al-Hakim, Al-Mustadrak, 44, 4/341).

2The Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said: ‘No human ever filled a vessel worse than the stomach. Sufficient for any son of Adam are some morsels to keep his back straight. But if it must be, then one third for his food, one third for his drink and one third for his breath’ (Tirmidhi 2380)

3Recitation of the three Quls (ie. Surat Al-Ikhlas/The Purity, Surat Al-Falaq/The Daybreak and Surat Al-Nas/Mankind) and Ayatul-Kursi.

Additional Resources:

Health in Islam

Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – The Fiqh of Food & Clothing’. Taught by Sheikh Bilal Ismail.

Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – The Divine Protection. The Fiqh & Power of the Daily Supplications. Taught by Sheikh Hacene Chebbani.

Teaching Children to memorise the Qur’an: Practical Tips

By Shamim F

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  • Purify the intention and correct the goal – One’s concern to memorise Qur’an and preserve it must be for Allah, for gaining His paradise and attaining His pleasure, and for acquiring the great rewards reserved for those who recite the Qur’an and memorise it. Reiterate the significance of this intention to your children.
  • Correcting Pronunciation and Recitation – Listen to a good precise reciter.
  • Set a daily limit for the amount of Qur’an to be memorised – Help your children set realistic goals insha’Allah that will also give your children a sense of achievement.
  • Continual Recitation and Review – of the daily portion you have set in order to ensure it is retained in the long-term memory. The recitation can be reaffirmed in fard/nafl prayers, while sitting in the Masjid before jama’ah prayers, while waiting for anything, before going to sleep etc. Make this repetition enjoyable for children and not a chore.
  • Reciting in a Melodic Tone – this conforms to the Sunnah and helps make memorization firm and strong.
  • Using the same mushaf (copy of the Qur’an) – a person memorises using vision and hearing. The script and form of the ayat, and their places in the mushaf leave an imprint in the mind when recited and looked at frequently. Using different mushafs confuses the memory and makes memorising more difficult.  Give each child their own Qur’an for memorization insha’Allah.
  • Understanding the meaning – this greatly aids memorization of the Qur’an. The memoriser should read the tafsir (explanation) of the ayat they want to memorise and bring these meanings to mind while reciting them. Try to establish a daily routine of reading tafsir with your children insha’Allah.
  • Reciting to others – a memoriser should test their memorisation by reciting the ayat to a companion who knows them by heart or can follow from the mushaf. This is a means of correcting any mistakes and keeping their mind constantly alert in avoiding these errors.
  • Constant review – constant revision and review of what has been memorised is necessary in order to retain it and protect it from slipping away.
  • Watching for analagous sections of the Qur’an – various parts of the Qur’an resemble each other in meaning, wording or repetition of ayat.
  • Taking advantage of the ‘Golden Hours’ of the day – best time to memorise Qur’an is the last part of the night before Fajr or the early morning hours that follow it.
  • Taking advantage of the ‘Golden Years’ of memorising – best years are from age of five to twenty-three.
  • Make dua and remember that Allah says in the Qur’an (54:22): “And We have made the Qur’an easy for remembrance (and understanding), so there is one that will receive admonition?”

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Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – ‘Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

Be A Friend (part 1)

By Ayesha K

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The end of your offspring’s childhood marks the beginning of a period of changes most commonly known as the teenage year. At this time there are usually two categories of parents; the first that enjoy this time because the effort they put into the many years of nurturing their child has produced a well-rounded young adult and so they are enjoying the fruits of their labour.  The second group are not so content and experience a lot of anxiety during this period.

If you find yourself in the first group then say ‘Alhamdulilah!’ and enjoy this time with your child and build a beautiful friendship with them. If you are in the second group then do not despair! Although this is a very difficult situation, there are some strategies you can adopt when dealing with your teen that will ease the situation insha Allah. Whether you are in the first or second group,  or you are reading this because you are being proactive and still have young or yet to be born children then hopefully you will find the strategies we have highlighted useful in either building or maintaining a good relationship with your teen.

The teenage years are the third and final period that was mentioned by Ali radiAllah anhu in his famous advice given on parenting. Ali (ra) said “Play with you children for seven (years), discipline him for seven (years), and be his companion for seven (years), then leave him after that”

There are three elements to this; understanding your teen, communicating effectively with them and knowing how to approach specific behavioural issues.

The anxiety that most parents experience is because they just do not understand and remember what the teenage years entail. So let’s take the first step and try and understand our teens better.

There is no specific time when adolescence begins, every child is different. Adolescence is characterised by the physiological changes of puberty, behavioural changes, attempts at individualisation, trying to gain acceptance from peers and finally an increased desire for independence. It is this desire for independence that can result in disagreement and isolation from parents.

The first step to understanding your teen is to educate yourself. This can be achieved by reading related literature and also reflecting over your teenage years.  Remember that you were once a teenager and reflect on the difficulties that you experienced during this time. This will help you emphasise with your child and improve the interaction between yourself and your teen.

Your teen is going through many changes during this time. Prepare them for it by speaking to them about what they should expect. They need the comfort of knowing that they are not alone and you understand what they are going through.

Wisdom is a vital tool during this time, pick your battles wisely. Do not condemn everything that your teen is doing. She wants to dye her hair the colours of the rainbow? Let her, it is better that she learns through small mistakes rather than committing acts that are majorly sinful.

Your child is an adult now; you need to make decisions concerning them together. So any expectations you have make them together this will lessen their anxiety.

Now your child is a teenager the best way of telling them what is permissible and what isn’t is to tell them the consequences of an action, the benefits of abstaining, an alternative to the action and then leave it to them. For example in regards to sexual relations and zina, tell them if for every minute engaged in illegal sexual activity they should liken it to spending a minute spent inside a hot tandoori oven.  Then tell that sexual relations between spouses is one of the pleasures created by Allah in this world and that if you protect yourself Allah will grant you a spouse that has done likewise.  Another good analogy that represents the consequences  of ones deeds is likening the world to a supermarket in which whatever you put in your shopping basket you have to pay for at checkout.

Many teenagers desire privacy. Give them this privacy but tell them this privilege is built on trust. If they break this trust it will come with consequences.

Even though they are all grown up now, you should still monitor your teen. You should monitor what they are watching, reading and accessing in your home. Some tips are to put the TV, tablet, PC in a public space that is continually being used such as the living room and not in a secluded area such as the bedroom.

Finally it is common for teens to go through some difficulties when dealing with the changes associated with adolescence. However some experience serious problem that require professional help. As a parent you need to be aware of the warning signs, some of them are:

  • extreme weight loss or gain
  • sleep problems
  • rapid, drastic changes in personality
  • sudden friend change
  • continuous bunking from school
  • failing grades
  • joking/ talking about suicide
  • drug/ alcohol abuse
  • illegal activity

Any of these changes or any inappropriate changes that last more than 6 weeks can indicate a major problem and medical help needs to be sought.

Your child becoming a teenage requires a complete change in your parenting style, they are no longer the child that needs your command, Rather  what they require is your friendship and support.  It is through understanding them that you will take the first step in befriending them and once you gain this friendship you will have a greater chance in influencing and guiding them in the right direction.

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Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

… and Actions Soon Follow

By Shamim F

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After instilling the Foundations of Emaan in your child it’s now time to put this into action by moving to the next phase of helping your child to fulfil the obligatory actions of worship. These actions of worship nourish and sustain Emaan and are an outer manifestation of it.

Salaat

As Allah (SWT) said in Surah TaHa, 20:132:

“And enjoin al-salaat on your family, and be patient in offering them (i.e. the salaat) …”

When should you start teaching your children Salaat?

As our Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) taught us that the best time for children to start learning about Salaat is at the age of seven so by the age of ten they have established it in their lives.

The benefit is that children have a good understanding of what they are doing at this age. Salaat should become something they like to do because of their belief in Allah and desire to please Him.

How should teach them?

Stages of teaching Salaat:

  1. Teach them Salaat properly at the age of 7.
  2. Discipline them at the age of 10.
  3. Gradual training to attend congregational prayer (Jumu’ah) with you.
  4. Gradual introduction to Qiyaam al-Layl.
  5. Training your children to do Salaat al-Istikharah.
  6. Accompanying your children for Salaat al-Eid.

Be a role model for your children and teach by example. This means establishing prayer within the home at its required time, and the family praying in congregation whenever possible. The family should encourage and remind one another regarding Salaat. Attach your children’s hearts to the Masjid by educating them about the features and benefits. Social gatherings provide an opportunity for children to interact with other muslim children and develop the bonds of community. You can also use motivational aids such as colouring in the ‘prayer tree’ to encourage children (see attached).

What about other acts of worship?

Fasting is a physical and spiritual act of worship that teaches many things including taqwa, patience, self-discipline, empathy for those less fortunate than us. Get children involved in Ramadhan when they are ready.

Hajj is from the greatest acts of worship and reinforces a real sense of community of faith. As per Hadith from Muslim children can perform Hajj and parents will get the reward.

Zakah

As Allah (SWT) said in Surat al-Tawbah, 9:103:

“Take sadaqah (alms) from their wealth in order to purify them and sanctify them with it, and invoke Allah for them. Verily! Your invocations are a source of security for them, and Allah is All-Hearer, All-Knower.”

Therefore, you should give sadaqah on behalf of your children as a means of protection and security for them.

In summary, we should take a gradual approach in teaching children the principles of the religion. This method will allow you to take the  time needed to change hearts and minds through education rather than simply imposing rules and laws. This will also ensure that children accept the customs of Islam by their own choice. Practical examples of application of this gradual approach may include wearing the hijab, learning how to pray correctly and fasting during Ramadhan.

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Alkauthar Institute Weekend Course – Parenting Matters, The art of raising Righteous Children’. Taught by Sheikh Alaa Elsayed.

Further reading recommended: Nurturing Eeman in Children by Dr. Aisha Hamdan